Since Clark and I dated for such a short period of time, we never had a true Valentine’s Day together until the one during our first year of marriage. While Clark is one of those people that believes Valentine’s Day to just be a holiday invented by the card companies, I am not. My family always celebrated Valentine’s Day with sugar cookies, cards, and ultimately our love. It was not necessarily about the love between a man and a woman, but the love of our family.

Our first Valentine’s Day as a married couple was pretty bad.

By this point Clark was deciding if he wanted to be in school or not. He had taken a break and was working at Walgreens full time in the photo department. This is during his spree of thinking he wanted to be a professional photographer.

I had class, so attended class and then returned home and made cookies.

I had bought new cookie cutters so that I might make heart shaped cookies. I took some to our neighbor and saved the rest for Clark.

I filled out the mushy sentimental card I got him, simply because it was our first Valentine’s Day, and then set to doing my homework until he arrived home. I planned on starting dinner as soon as he arrived.
Clark came home late from work. While he did have the perfect card ready to give me, I was disappointed.
I had told him I didn’t want him to get me anything, and so he didn’t. I had at least made him cookies, but he had nothing. No chocolates, no flowers- just a card. He had really listened and didn’t get me anything. Since when do guys listen?

I cooked dinner and we ate in silence. I was marinating in my own self pity.

I had instructed him on renting a movie for the night on his way home, but of course he had forgotten. So, we went to Blockbuster as soon as we finished eating.

I told him he had to go in by himself. I had told him earlier two movies that were my choices. A week earlier “No Reservations” and some other chick flick had come out and I wanted one or the other.

Clark went in with several other people trying to rent movies. After about 30 minutes of me sitting in the car, he emerged looking rather excited. He held up “Elizabeth: The Golden Age.” His thinking process was that we had watched “Elizabeth” a week or so before, and he knew I really wanted to see the second one.
While any other girl would probably be ecstatic that her man was actually thinking about her and not himself, I was devastated once again. I had wanted our first Valentine’s Day to be perfect. Cards, flowers, chocolates, homemade sugar cookies, and a romantic movie. Instead, we had cards, sugar cookies, and a historical movie that wasn’t even entirely historically accurate.

We went home and watched the movie. I fell asleep, and Clark got upset with me. I explained that I was just a “little bit” disappointed with the day. He then went in to, “Well, Valentine’s Day isn’t a real holiday, anyway. I tried my best.”

I exploded. We’ll just say I said some harsh words along the lines of, “you didn’t try at all.”
We went to bed like a grumpy old married couple.

The next day I went through my usual routine. Class, home, homework, cleaning, etc. Clark came home and entered by saying, “Please go in the other room. I have a surprise!”

I picked up my books and went in to our bedroom and closed our door after a few questions which he did not answer. I waited.

Finally Clark came in and asked if he could lead me out. I closed my eyes and he led me to sit on the couch. He exclaimed, “Open!”

On our kitchen counter (we were in a rather small apartment) was a vase of roses, cut up gouda cheese, a bottle of sparkling cider, and a box of chocolates. He had not been able to rent a chick flick, but instead he produced “Moulin Rouge,” which was the first movie we had watched together at a friend’s house.
I was amazed, but I felt like I didn’t deserve it. After saying mean things and throwing a temper, Clark had done what I wanted.

However, that wasn’t the case at all. Clark explained that he had never liked Valentine’s Day because it always put unneeded pressure on people. He said he understood that my family had always celebrated it, and he would be more than happy to keep the tradition going.

He also said he thought the day after was a much better day. Why, you ask? Well, because it wasn’t an invented holiday, according to him. It was just a random day where he could show how much he loved me, without someone or some tradition telling him to do so.

Needless to say we didn’t go to bed like an old married couple that night.

Our first Valentine’s Day taught us both a thing or two. The following year Clark had flowers delivered to our door for me, and took me on a road trip to Asheville with dinner and a movie planned out. However, it taught me something as well.

Wrong movie and wrong time, but the Grinch comes to the realization that Christmas is Christmas no matter what.

Well, I realized that at age 18 about Valentine’s Day as well.

Holidays are holidays, no matter what. Whether you get presents or not, it’s about the love.
I think my parents tried to teach that to me and I completely lost the concept once I had a loved one, besides family, to share it with.

While my number one “love language” is gifts, I have learned to adjust to Clark’s kinds of gifts. They don’t always come in packages with bows, sometimes they are small gestures to show me how much he cares.
I took a lesson from the Grinch, and from Moulin Rouge, and just kept telling myself, “Come what may, I will love him, until my dying day.”

Oh, yes, it’s cheesey. But who cares? God brought Clark and I together for a reason, and we have time a head of us to work on our relationship.

We have time to work to grow closer together through our love of Jesus Christ and each other. What more could we ask for?

Remember, it’s all about the love!

I've been craving cooking lately. I even signed up for a cake decorating class (which I am positively stoked about. I was wanting to make a new type of bar (since bars haven't exactly been my specialty), and I just googled "oatmeal bars" hoping to get some inspiration.

Then I found this recipe on Kath Eats Real Food and had an idea. What if, instead of all the different seeds, nuts, and dried fruits... you just measured out your favorite trail mix into the bar? It sounded brilliant (not to toot my own horn)!

So, the "trail mix" that's my favorite isn't exactly a trail mix. It's called "Banana Split". It has dried bananas, cranberries, and pineapple with little pieces of chocolate, caramel, and marshmallows in it and then there are two or three different types of nuts in it as well. It's not exactly healthy, and I'm not sure it can truly even qualify as a trail mix, but I thought I'd use it anyway because it just sounded oh-so-delicious!

Ingredients:

- 2 C your favorite trail mix (I only used 1 3/4 C *pictured* and it seemed to make them just a tad bit too spongey for my taste. I think just a little more trail mix would have helped with that!)

- 1.5 C Rolled Oats
- 1 Egg
- 2 tsp Vanilla
- 1 1/4 C Milk

*Optional: 1/3 C Brown Sugar (I did not use sugar, but if you want them a little sweeter you should probably add it. According to my husband, without the sugar, they "taste healthy"... gosh forbid!)

Directions:
- Preheat the oven to 350.

- Mix together your trail mix and the oats.
- Mix together the vanilla, milk, and egg, then add it to the dry mixture.

- Pour the mix in a 9 x 9 pan (prepared with non-stick spray).

- Bake for 40 to 45 minutes.
You can wrap these individually and freeze them, too, so they're great on-the-go. Or you can warm them in the microwave. A great, healthy snack that gives you a boost of energy.

I've been thinking for a while what the perfect dessert would be for my birthday. I know, silly and maybe a bit selfish, but I can't help LOVING my birthday.

When I made those Key Lime Bars a few weeks back, I had the idea of Key Lime Cupcakes. The recipe was growing in my head like a virus, and then... what do you know... someone posted a recipe on Sweet As Sugar Cookies. I was a little devastated that someone got to do the honors before me, but why should that stop me from being creative? Plus, I would have never thought to use Lime Jell-O!


Oh, yes. This is exciting!

Ingredients:

- 1 box of Lime Jell-O
- 2 1/4 C Unbleached, All-Purpose Flour
- 3 1/2 TSP Baking Powder
- 3/4 C Sugar
- 1/2 C Butter or Margarine, softened (1 stick)
- 1/4 C Vegetable or Canola Oil
- 3 Eggs
- 1 Tbsp + 1 tsp Vanilla
- 1/3 C Key Lime Juice
- 3/4 C Water


Directions:

- In a medium sized bowl, mix together the Jell-O, flour, and baking powder. Set aside.
- In a large bowl, whip the butter until nice and soft. Then add the sugar, mixing until well blended. Next add the oil, eggs, and vanilla (all separate).
- Squeeze some key limes (I had to use six) until you get 1/3 C of juice. Then add it to your wet mixture.


- Add the flour mixture to the wet mixture in thirds. Add 1/3 of mixture, then 1/4 C of water, until you have completely mixed it all in.



- Fill the pan holes about 2/3rds of the way full.

- Bake in the oven for 18 to 20 minutes. Remove and let them cool before applying frosting!
For the frosting I used my own Cream Cheese Frosting from my Red, White, & Blue Cake.

I got to use my fabulous new gizmo called a cupcake-corer from Williams-Sonoma.


I topped some of them with only powdered sugar because I was afraid of too much frosting. However, I discovered that wasn't possible (in my opinion, of course).





(Inspiration for this recipe came from Cups by Kim.)

Enjoy!

I am a BIG birthday person.

It may be a little selfish thoroughly enjoying a day that's all about me, but whatever.

I am a BIG birthday person.

This doesn't mean that I just love celebrating my birthday. Oh, no. I LOVE people's birthdays. I've always been the one to try to bake cupcakes, or a cake, or cookies, or something to make the day a little more special.

My last two birthdays have definitely been special. My 21st birthday was celebrated going out at midnight with Clark and two of my closest friends. Then, my family was visiting and we all went out and celebrated the following day. I felt so loved.

Going out at midnight.

Celebrating with my family. (The pink cake my little sister made me didn't make it into this shot, but it was perfect.)

Last year we spent my birthday at the doctor's office finding out that our baby-to-be was going to be a boy! We then went out shopping for him. We returned home and Clark and I made a Funfetti cake together with blue frosting to not only celebrate my birthday, but the imp[ending birth of our son.

19 weeks pregnant. Going to the doc's office to find out the sex of the baby!

Home after a day of shopping for our baby boy. Celebrating with some blue frosting!

Birthdays just make me happy. It's not necessarily that it's all about me, or all about that person, it's that we get to spend some amazing quality time together. Not only that, but it brings out the best in people. You get to make people feel so incredibly special and remind them how thankful you are that they're here; that they were born.

This year Clark has stepped up and made it a birth-week for me. I've gotten a surprise every day. I definitely can't complain. Tonight we're going out to dinner (on a date) before being home and celebrating with Michael. I'm so excited.

Not to mention I have a new recipe for cupcakes. Intrigued? Check back tomorrow!

Every year I always make a goal. It doesn’t matter if it’s to not miss a day of class (unless ill), to eat healthier, to exercise regularly, to forgive without question, or to make straight As for the semester- I always make a goal. Since I’ve been married, Clark has joined in on the tradition, but there’s a catch: we make a goal for us.

Our first New Year’s together as a married couple was spent in Germany. The Germans really know how to celebrate the holiday. It made no difference that it was 2008 there six hours before it was 2008 in the US. In fact, it almost made it more special.
(Us at Frankenstein's Castle soon after New Year's. I didn't have a picture from New Year's, sadly.)

Because we were all dreadfully tired from the trip, we stayed in the house and played games until midnight. Dad bought Champagne for the family and we all enjoyed time together as we waited for “the ball to drop.”

Why in quotes? Well, the ball didn’t actually drop. However, it did sound like bombs were going off around us. The Germans celebrate the holiday with fireworks. Their fireworks for New Years are even better than ours for the Fourth of July! It was amazing. I actually have a video clip somewhere from filming the fireworks. They go on, and on, and on, and on. Finally we were all laughing so hard I had to stop filming. We just stood at the window in the kitchen and watched as the sky was lit up for nearly, if not longer than, an hour.

We toasted Champagne with my little sister’s sparkling cider and said our goals out load to those around us. It seemed to make it more special by sharing our hopes and desires for the New Year with family.

So, Clark and I make a goal every year.

At this point I can honestly say I don’t remember what our goals were for the past few years, but I always feel like we achieved it. Each year we grow more; not only as adults, but as a married couple and as Christians. Yes, our focus always has its moments where it strays from what’s important, but each New Year seems to give us a brand new start. Not even just every new year, but every day.

Our first New Years was especially important, because I felt like it was our first step together. We had gotten married at a time where we both realized that time is short. My best friend’s remains had been found, and it was enough to kick my butt in gear to never take advantage of time. I think it had the same affect on Clark, because it obviously lead us to where we are now.

I have no funny story to share this time or something that might make you smile at our situation. I think this should be more about starting the New Year right. The New Year is not about looking back and wishing we could have done more, but looking forward and seeing the potential in the time ahead. Although people say that there’s “no day but today,” the truth is that we have every day and every year to live and look forward to because we have Jesus Christ in our hearts.

While Clark and I may have seized time to be married and have a life together, we did not do it because we were afraid of dying. We got married because we accepted that our time on earth is limited, but we know full well our days after death are eternal.

I think every New Years it’s important to remember that “tomorrow is another day.” Whether today is your last day or not, you are always going to have a tomorrow through Jesus. Start the New Year right and always remember that everything and anything is possible through Jesus Christ. I think it’s one of the biggest struggles faith puts before us, but Clark and I always try to keep it in mind. New Years, to me, is a day to celebrate our tomorrows because there’s no day, but the first day, to do it.

This year our goal was, no matter the craziness, to put Michael and each other first. We are nearing our "grown-up" goals of finally being able to settle somewhere, and it's so hard to remember that when times get really rough. We have been so blessed thus far and know it will continue to be that way as long as we keep our faith. It's hard to believe April's almost over and we're almost halfway through 2012, but that's how time goes.

When company visits I tend to always want to try something new. Although I typically don't make alcoholic desserts, I just couldn't pass up trying!

These Rum Balls are easy and delicious (with that extra buzz)!

Ingredients:

- 1.5 to 2 C finely crushed Nilla Wafers
- 1 to 2 C Coconut flakes
- 1/3 C fat free, sweetened condensed milk
- 1/3 C Light (Silver) Rum

Directions:

- Crush the wafers in your food processor. About 6 wafers makes 1/4 C of crumbs, so that should give you an idea of how many you need.
- Mix in 1 C coconut before adding the condensed milk and rum.
- Roll the mixture into 1" or so balls, and then roll the balls in the extra coconut flakes. The first round of these I made about 6 after using only 1 C of Nilla Wafers in the mix and figured out that there was no way they were going to be solid enough.
- So, after making the six I added another 1/2 C of Nilla Wafers (crushed). Play it by ear. This is how the mixture should look:

- Store the balls in an airtight container in the fridge for at least four hours.


Voila! Yummy, delicious, and oh so easy!

(Inspiration for this recipe came from Yummly.com)

<--Super SAHM (Stay At Home Mom)



VERSES



Every Day Me-->

The New Myth of the Stay At Home Mom.

Read that blog post and tell me you don't laugh, or agree for that matter. It's definitely my generation that's taking over as the new SAHMs.

After reading that article, it completely got to me.

I realized that many things I do these days is simply to keep up with others. The fact that I went to college for Creative Writing and truly hope to make a living out of it someday means nothing when there are so many who went to school for random things and blog as well.

Everyone can blog.

I realized that the new SAHM fashion is to blog. To be an entrepreneur. To be "perfect plus". Every mom has to write about her life. Every mom has to do crafts. Every wife has to do something that makes her look like the perfect wife and mother.

For those who aren't mothers yet, they find ways to seem perfect otherwise. A career, outside or inside the home. A clean house. Dinner on the table. Perfect.

My friends, it doesn't exist.

As Kate confesses to dirt and mess and black coffee, every SAHM has something that isn't perfect. Every SAHM has something that's making them appear perfect.

I'll admit, I started this blog that way.

I hoped to portray the 21st Century Stay At Home Wife and Mother. However, I wanted to portray this character as perfect. A Leave-It-To-Beaver-50s-Reincarnated-Wife.

I soon realized that was impossible.

I started off with a category called "Through the Lens". I did this because so many women that I went to high school with were starting their own photography businesses. They were all making money being creative. So, I thought maybe if I took up photography it would lead to my writing being noticed.

Don't get me wrong. I still want to learn the ins and outs of photography, but I want to learn because I want to be able to capture my children/family as it grows, not really to make a business out of it.

Then I thought I should take up crocheting. Many of my friends and high school classmates were taking up crochet or knitting projects. I mean, they can make baby blankets and hats and this and that and I wanted to be that good.

Turns out I'm not. I do not have the knack for sewing or crocheting no matter how hard I try.

Also, when I started out the blog, I had an "Around the House" category. I soon learned that I really didn't have "around the house" tips to share.

I am an awful house-keeper.

When I say that, I mean that I'm awful at keeping my house clean. It's not that I don't want to, it's that I just don't see it as important sometimes. The dust will gather and the dog hair will accumulate and the bed will go unmade and the washed/dried laundry will hang out in our rocking chair until I finally get some time to dedicate to it.

The two places I'm paranoid about are my kitchen and my bathroom. Other than that, everything piles up until it finally gets to me. Then I explode and go into nagging-and-cleaning-mode. Ask Clark. It's very true. So, I stopped trying to pretend that I'm good at keeping my house cleaning. Someday "Around the House" may return, but only when I have a house and I can write about decorating.

I LOVE decorating. I HATE cleaning.

I realized after a while that I had to stop comparing myself to all these acquaintances/friends/strangers and just be myself. If I strive to constantly be others or do what others are doing, than I am just any other blogging SAHM. I don't want to be one of "them". I want to be ME. I want my voice to be discovered and I really hope, someday, I'll make a break and will actually be published.

After all, if Snooki can write a book, I'm pretty dang sure I have a chance.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that some people aren't legitimately talented. I'm not saying that some aren't legitimately crafty. I'm not saying that if you went to school to be a teacher or doctor or whatever, you don't have the right to blog or do something else that you're interested in. That's not what I'm saying at all.

What I'm saying is I'm not competing. I'm just doing what I want to do and I'm going to stop worrying about what "they" are doing.

I think the Super SAHMs exist because for a while women were all into careers. Some women still are. There's nothing wrong with that. But if you go to college, or you get married young, or you decide that once you're married you want to stay home-- some people, some women look down on you for that.


So, the Super SAHMs came into being. They decided that they would show a clean house, intelligent and well groomed children, perfectly cooked dinners and pies, PLUS something else. Whether it's crocheted blankets, a photography business, new recipes, or whatever. It's like my generation feels like it's not OK to be "just" a SAHM. We have to be SUPER SAHMs.

So, here's my deal.

* I use cloth diapers.

* I make almost all of Michael's baby food.

* I BF and give Michael formula and I'm not ashamed of it. He needed the formula to gain weight, and now he's used to it. As long as he's a happy and healthy baby, I don't care what he drinks.

* Michael still sleeps with us. I am a little concerned about his napping habits, but other than that his sleep will develop with his age. When he's ready to sleep in his crib, he will.

* I like a clean kitchen and a clean bathroom. Everything else... it'll happen eventually.

* I'm really not interested in making laundry detergent or cleaners at home.

* I cannot crochet. Thus far I haven't had any luck at sewing. But I do like crafts.

* I am not a professional cook, but that is one craft I want to continue to learn.

* I am very interested in anything that has to do with books. Reading parenting books, writing stories from my point of view, and other things. Writing is what I want to do with my life, and blogging is just one way to do that right now.

* I lose my patience. When we've had a few rough days in a row, I tend to have to find a time to put Michael down, give him to Clark, or just find a way to have a little peaceful time to myself.

* I sometimes have to remind myself that the excess weight I still have is there because I have a beautiful baby boy, and I'll lose it eventually.

* I am constantly looking things up via google, or asking my mom or sister, or looking in Dr. Sears's baby book because I'm already paranoid about everything that could possibly be wrong with Michael.

* Dust doesn't bother me. I dust so Clark doesn't die of allergies (and because it's probably not very healthy to have it lying around). But it doesn't bother me until people visit. Then it bothers me.

* At least once a week I give in and we order pizza or get salads or frozen meals because I just don't want to cook.

This list of confessions could go on, so I'll just stop here. I really think I've made my point :).

So, are you a SUPER SAHM, or just going with the flow and doing what you want to do? Or do the two collide together to make you?

Holidays are my favorite time of the year. From Halloween to New Years days are full with non-stop happy wishes and holiday cheer.

However, when you are spending the holidays with the new in-laws who were not expecting they’re 18 year old “baby” to be married off so young, then you may run in to some problems.

Let’s go back to the first holidays of mine and my husband’s married life. While we had, at this point, obviously told our parents that we were married and had gone through the ups and downs of tears, yelling, concern, lectures, and all that jazz, we were now venturing in to a new territory. We were venturing in to family traditions. The thing was, we were introducing each other in to different family traditions, so to speak.

Thanksgiving

Our first Thanksgiving was spent with Clark’s family. While typically Thanksgiving is a huge ordeal, lucky enough for me it wasn’t as large my first year in to it. I was also lucky enough to have my older sister go with me because her college was nearby enough and she was unable to fly home to California to be with her husband.

It began with his mom not liking pumpkin pie. I brought my own supplies to make the dish, unable to believe that this wasn’t a tradition of theirs. My sister promised to help me; not only with the pie, but with support.

My pie was the last thing allowed to be made. After all, both sets of Clark’s grandparents and his great uncle were over. There was wine, turkey, roast, deviled eggs, sweet potatoes, pecan pie—the whole works. However, I was determined to get a pumpkin pie made so my sister and I would have some taste of home.

I was finally allowed in the kitchen. I put it together while the oven was preheating, finished rapidly so I wouldn’t be in the way, put the finishing touches on the mixture, and put it in the oven. I set the timer and walked out of the kitchen to socialize and wait.

Many minutes later, while everyone had started eating and was enjoying the Thanksgiving vibe, the timer went off. I bounced out of my seat and went to the oven. Opening it up cautiously with the ovenmit, I noticed something rather strange—the oven was COLD.

Much to my dismay, someone had turned it off. As I took the pie out of the oven, half cooked but still nearly entirely liquid in the middle, I heard a voice behind me. “Oh, my, I completely forgot your pie was in there and I turned off the oven. I thought I had turned it on.”

I turned to see my mother-in-law standing behind me. The same woman who had been sneaking in and out of the kitchen as I cooked and was even in the kitchen as I placed the pie in the oven. The same woman who had admitted to despising pumpkin pie. The woman who was the reason this family had never had pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving.

I was livid. I went to Katie for comfort, feeling as though the action had been done to show me my new place in the family. Later, I even cried to Clark. He said to let it go, and prayed with me. Unfortunately my feelings were still hurt for years to follow, but now that it's been almost five years I've finally put it in the past. After all, we had only been married for two months. It could have been an accident.

I did get past it, moved on with the day, and even got some apple cider made for everyone to enjoy. I just couldn’t be there on Thanksgiving and contribute nothing—even if my mother-in-law truly did not want my help at the moment. These days I cook every time we visit them. I guess I've moved up in the world ;)!

Christmas

Christmas was definitely a different ball game. At the beginning of my freshman year of college, only a month before my husband and I secretly wed, my parents moved to Germany thanks to the US Army. Having to have gone through all the steps of the whys and hows over the phone, it was much more difficult for Clark.

Luckily, my parents made it easy on him. Nervous and shaking, we got off the plane and readied ourselves to meet my mom, dad, and little sister, Molly. We were greeted with hugs, kisses, and questions of our flight. My dad even hugged Clark! It seemed too good to be true.

This is the part where I’m supposed to intersect and tell how you awful it got, right?

Well, Clark is a lucky man. Although there was the occasional, “I just wonder if you guys got married too young,” from my mother, and side tracked counseling sessions from my father (a minister), it truly was a great experience.

While it was much different for Clark only opening one present Christmas Eve and the rest Christmas morning, he was shocked to find that he had just as many gifts as me.

We attended church the night before (Christmas Eve) and were paraded in front of my dad’s new community. Taking part in the service by reading a scripture, Clark was red in the cheeks. Then with our typical night of wild rice soup, twice baked potatoes, and watching “Scrooge”, Clark was content.

Although he did consistently talk about what his family’s traditions were, he grew to love my family’s as well. He even insisted the year after that we buy “Scrooge” to watch it. He also insisted that we do the Advent Wreath, something that is a very fond tradition with my family.

I am not saying that my family was better than his. I am simply saying they had different ways of accepting us into their homes. I know it was just as difficult on them, but their time with us was more limited in the beginning... and therefore I think more precious.

It was difficult for Clark’s mom to understand that, at home, I helped my mom cook and was always in charge of the pies. It was difficult for my parents to understand that Clark’s whole family gathered Christmas Eve to open presents.

It was hard for both of our parents to understand why we got married so young.

Still, our parents got through it, much like we did. With the love and support of family, I think anything and everything is possible.
That’s why this time of year is my favorite. It is full of friends, family, and ultimately love. What is that quote? “Love actually is all around.”

Thanksgiving is a time to be thankful for all that we have, and Christmas is a time to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. What time of year could be more beautiful than that?

While Clark and I are still figuring out how holidays are going to be spent each year, we always keep in mind our first holiday experiences. Perhaps it’s to recognize how much we have grown since then, and even how much our families have grown since then.

It’s all a process, but what we always have to remember, even if someone turns off the oven or reminds us that we got married “too young”, we just have to remember that “Love actually is all around.”

It's warm outside, summer is approaching, and I'm craving fruits and fruity desserts. So here's a new one! Nilla Wafer crust, key lime body, and (optional) strawberry glaze. Can you say yum?

Ingredients:

- 1 package of fresh strawberries (I believe it's 12 or 16 oz)
- 1 tbsp + 2 tsp Sugar

- 1 and 1/2 C crushed Nilla Wafers
- 5 tbsp melted butter

- 3 Fresh Limes
- 8 oz Light Cream Cheese
- 14 oz Fat Free condensed milk

Directions:

- If you're going to put the strawberry glaze on top, cut up your strawberries and coat them with the sugar. Mix them well and put them in the fridge, covered, for at least a solid hour.

- Preheat the oven to 350.
- Crush your Nilla Wafers using a food processor. I didn't keep track of how many wafers it took, but it did not take the whole box to make 1.5 C.

- Mix together the crushed wafers and melted butter, then gently spread/ pat on the bottom of a sprayed 9 x 9 baking dish. Put in the fridge for at least 30 minutes.

- While the crust is setting, get ready for the time consuming parts. First, if your strawberries are ready, put them in the food processor (rinsed/washed so there are no wafer crumbs) and puree until no chunks, or very few, are to be seen.

-Pour the puree into a pan and bring to a boil over medium heat. Let it "cook" for around ten minutes to let some of the moisture out of the mix. Remove from heat and put in the fridge (or just let it sit) for 15 to 30 minutes.


- While the strawberries are sitting, on to the next time consuming part.
- Whip the cream cheese with the whisk attachment on your Mix Master or Hand Mixer for thirty seconds or so.

- Zest one of your limes completely into the cream cheese mix. Do not throw it away once you've zested it!



- Squeeze the juice out of your limes until you have 1/3 C of juice.



- Add the lime juice and your condensed milk.


- Take your crust from the fridge and spread the cream cheese mixture evenly over it.


- Add the strawberry glaze next.


- Cook for 22 to 25 minutes. Let cool for 20 minutes or so and then put in the freezer. The longer they're in the freezer, the firmer they will be. Mine broke (as pictured) because they were probably only in the freezer for 20 minutes. The next day they were so firm they had to thaw for fifteen minutes. Just be aware of both extremes!